Wednesday, June 17, 2009

A Word From the Commissioner...

The Commish

Gentlemen and readers, 

As general purpose commissioner of this and all competitions, I'd like to wish both participants the best of luck. In the coming weeks and months, I will be performing interviews with both parties in order to see how progress (or lack thereof) is going. 

What I'd like to ask of both of you is to keep detailed logs of your food and portion size intake on this blog, along with your musings and erotic haikus. Also, it might be a good idea to also keep some log of exercise up as well (action and length of time). I'd like to be able to take that data and crunch it in a pertinent way for a weekly update chart or string of insults.

Beyond that, I'll keep everyone informed of league developments, weight loss competition infractions, and day-to-day events here at the Commissioner's Office. Hopefully, one of you will die via this competition, and I'll be able to transition my detailed notes into a wonderful screenplay, while your estate sees zero of the proceeds. 

Once again, boys, good luck. 

Also, you're fat. Stop it.

Sincerely, 

Andrew K. 
Commissioner   

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